So what if i break down?

I'm in a weird mood, I wish it was a mood that could be changed by a good nights sleep or a tub of ice cream. I've tried both and right now I'm still stuck. I feel lost, I don't know how to be happy, I cant let myself be sad because I don't now if I would have the strength to pick myself up. I hate it. Right now I need the people who made me happy, because I can always trust them to pick me back up. I feel... I dont really know. This is probably driving you mad because I'm just rambling but that is how I feel in my life right now, I don't really have an aim, schools finished (good!) but after having weeks of school work and concentrating I suddenly have nothing to fill my spare time with. I have just done a ballet show, over. I just had a big science test, over. I had a really close friend, over. I had days filled with school and lots of people, over. I feel like I'm over, I dont really know I dont feel anything. I need my stars so much but on monday I felt like someone was trying to take you away, and I was down, I was stuggling so hard to get back up. Like I was drowning. In broken strings 'you cant play on broken strings, you cant feel anything' I feel like a broken string :L Like I am something less than I used to be. okay, this is me right now:
I used to be a ship on the water, I had my anchor that stopped me going under, then something happened, I started sinking. now the water is nearly coming over my head and I'm struggling to get back up, I need someone to put their arms around me and pull me out because I don't have the strength to do it myself.

Happy:

Holding on tightly, just can't let it go
Just trying to play my role, slowly disappear, oh
But all these days, they feel like they're the same
Just different faces, different names, get me out of here
But I can't stand by your side, oh no
And watch this life pass me by, pass me by

Okay now lyrics that some of you wont like so it you're cynic then stop reading now. but this blog is for my feelings and this is how i feel :L sorry x

Superman:

But I hope someday he'll take me away and save the day, yeah
Something in his deep brown eyes has me saying, 
He's not all bad like his reputation
And I can't hear one single word they say.
And you'll leave, got places to be and I'll be OK



And I watch you fly around the world 
And I hope you don't save some other girl
Don't forget, don't forget about me
I'm far away but I never let you go


Sorry for moaning and rambling


love from me xxx